I got married for the first time in my early 30s, had my first child a year later, and another two years after that. We divorced when I was 48. For a while, I thought I was done with dating altogether, convinced that I would never dip my toes back into the dating pool. But as I began to process everything I’d been through, I realized that I couldn’t wait to get back out there.
Sure, I was nervous—who wouldn’t be? I’d heard all the horror stories about dating in your 40s. Friends shared tales of awkward encounters, mismatched expectations, and even ghosting. Some of those stories were true; I did encounter a few cringe-worthy moments myself. But honestly, a lot of my experiences have been surprisingly wonderful.
Towards the end of my marriage, I found myself feeling lost and unsure of who I was. I was a mother, a partner, and a homemaker, but I had lost touch with my identity as an individual. After the divorce, I had to rediscover myself and confront my desires. I took time to reflect on my past relationships, the good and the bad, and what I truly wanted moving forward.
This journey wasn’t easy, especially given the legal troubles I faced. I found myself dealing with a stalker and harasser, which added layers of complexity and anxiety to my life. The emotional toll was significant, and I often walked around my neighborhood feeling the weight of a tarnished reputation due to the defamation and libel from my stalker. It was frustrating and painful, but I knew I had to rise above it.
In the midst of all this chaos, I made a decision that would change everything: I decided to start Tempting Eden. This venture became my outlet for self-expression and empowerment, a space where I could embrace my sexuality and help others do the same. At 49, I’m a perimenopausal divorcee rediscovering my desires with a newfound intensity. It blows me away how my libido seems to be thriving now, perhaps even more than it did in my 20s!
Sex has always been a vital part of our human experience, yet it’s something we often shy away from discussing openly. The stigma around sexuality can be overwhelming, especially for women as they age. But I’ve come to realize that pleasure is ageless. The toys available today are not only more sophisticated but also cater to a broader range of preferences. From vibrators to kinks, there’s something for everyone, and having the courage to say what I like—rather than falling back on the familiar “I don’t know”—has made all the difference.
As I explore this new chapter of my life, I find that open communication in intimate relationships is incredibly liberating. It’s thrilling to express what I want without fear of judgment. I’ve learned that speaking up about my desires enhances the experience for both myself and my partner. Damn, I wish I’d known how to advocate for my own pleasure in my 20s!
But then again, would I have the same appreciation for these moments if I hadn’t gone through the challenges I’ve faced? Probably not. My past experiences, both the wonderful and the painful, have shaped who I am today. They’ve taught me resilience, self-love, and the importance of embracing my sexuality without shame.
Starting Tempting Eden is about more than just selling products; it’s about creating a community where people can feel empowered to explore their desires and find joy in their sensuality. I want to inspire others, especially women, to reclaim their sexual autonomy and revel in their bodies—no matter their age. This isn’t just a business venture for me; it’s a passion project that reflects my journey and the importance of self-discovery.
So, as I stand on the brink of 50, I’m excited about what lies ahead. I’m open to new experiences, whether they involve thrilling encounters or simply enjoying quiet moments of intimacy with myself. The journey of rediscovering my sexuality has been eye-opening, and I can’t wait to see where it leads.
Here’s to new beginnings, embracing our desires, and creating a space where everyone can feel free to explore. Thank you for joining me on this adventure at Tempting Eden—let’s celebrate our sensual selves together!